{"id":599,"date":"2012-01-11T04:20:58","date_gmt":"2012-01-11T03:20:58","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/xn--bykadada-65ab.biz\/?p=599"},"modified":"2023-07-08T17:09:39","modified_gmt":"2023-07-08T16:09:39","slug":"o-cocugum-ben","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/xn--bykadada-65ab.biz\/?p=599","title":{"rendered":"O \u00c7ocu\u011fum ben."},"content":{"rendered":"

Ahmet\u2019in ar\u015fivinden \u00e7\u0131kart\u0131p g\u00f6rselimize sundu\u011fu resimlere bak\u0131yorum.<\/strong> \"\"<\/a>
\u00c7ocuklu\u011fumuzda sahip olamad\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z\u00a0\u00a0 foto\u011fraf makinesinin ne kadar iyi bir yol arkada\u015f\u0131 oldu\u011funu ke\u015ffediyorum.\u00a0Kaybolmu\u015f an\u0131lar\u0131m canlan\u0131veriyor birden bire. Bakarken siyah beyaz resimlere, renkleniyorlar g\u00f6z bebeklerimde.
\u00c7ocuklu\u011fumuzun Futbol sahas\u0131, aram\u0131zda yapt\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z ma\u00e7lar; resimler siyah, beyaz renklenerek canlan\u0131yor sanki. Kaleci oyuncu kavram\u0131 vard\u0131. Tak\u0131mlar\u0131n genellikle iyi oyuncular\u0131 bu kutsal g\u00f6reve kendilerini adarlard\u0131. Ben hep kaleci olarak yer al\u0131rd\u0131m sahada. Bir topu tutmak i\u00e7in kendimi yerlere at\u0131p kolumu, dizimi par\u00e7alamay\u0131 g\u00f6ze al\u0131rd\u0131m, ama\u00e7 arkada\u015flar\u0131n be\u011fenisini kazanamakt\u0131. Para o zamanlar kolay bulunmad\u0131\u011f\u0131ndan ma\u00e7\u0131n hangi tak\u0131m taraf\u0131ndan ba\u015flat\u0131laca\u011f\u0131na; bir taraf\u0131na t\u00fck\u00fcr\u00fclm\u00fc\u015f yass\u0131 bir ta\u015f\u0131n havaya at\u0131l\u0131p, ya\u015f m\u0131,kuru mu se\u00e7iminde do\u011fru taraf\u0131 bilen taraf\u0131n ba\u015flamas\u0131 y\u00f6ntemi ile karar verilirdi. Resmiler siyah beyaz\u00a0 \u00e7ekilmi\u015f, olsun; ben renkli g\u00f6r\u00fcyorum ya.\"\"<\/a>
Dikenlerin aras\u0131ndan ge\u00e7erek Naki beye ula\u015f\u0131yorum . Bal\u0131k tutan birka\u00e7 ki\u015fi\u2026 Sahilde g\u00fcne\u015flenenler, y\u00fczenler, botlarda, kay\u0131klarda e\u011flenenler, bah\u00e7elerinde ak\u015fama d\u00f6nen g\u00fcn bat\u0131m\u0131n\u0131 kar\u015f\u0131layanlar, B\u00fcy\u00fck ada\u00a0 kendi hallince. Her yaz oldu\u011fu gibi, Naki bey; bu k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck deniz\u00a0 k\u0131y\u0131 \u015feridindeki, K\u00f6\u015fk\u00fc, sahile kadar uzanan bah\u00e7esi, denize kadar uzanan iskelesi ve bu s\u00fckunet Nakibey konuklu\u011fundan ho\u015fnut. Sahilde\u00a0 oturuyor ve g\u00f6zlerimi yumuyorum. Bu sahil iskelesi olan ki\u015finin ad\u0131 ile an\u0131l\u0131rd\u0131. Kumsal\u0131n hemen yukar\u0131s\u0131nda Ko\u00e7o amcan\u0131n evi, bir de k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck bostan\u0131 vard\u0131. Sahilde oturuyor ve g\u00f6zlerimi yumuyorum. Sevgisizli\u011fin egemen oldu\u011fu bir d\u00fcnyadan bir an uzakla\u015fmak istiyorum. Tenime de\u011fen r\u00fczg\u00e2ra b\u0131rak\u0131yorum kendimi. Denizin sesi insanlar\u0131n ba\u011f\u0131r\u0131\u015f \u00e7a\u011f\u0131r\u0131\u015flar\u0131 aras\u0131nda yok olup, g\u00fcr\u00fclt\u00fcye yeniliyor. Ku\u015f c\u0131v\u0131lt\u0131lar\u0131 tek t\u00fck.
Naki bey\u2019in iskelesine \u00e7\u0131k\u0131yor ve ard\u0131mda kalan g\u00fcne kulak kesiliyorum. Ge\u00e7irdi\u011fim zamandan, bu adan\u0131n \u00f6yk\u00fcs\u00fcn\u00fc anlatmas\u0131n\u0131 istiyorum. \"\"<\/a>Pek \u00e7ok deniz k\u0131y\u0131s\u0131 ortak, bu g\u00f6r\u00fcnt\u00fclerin d\u0131\u015f\u0131nda anlat\u0131r var olan \u00f6yk\u00fcy\u00fc. G\u00fcn boyu \u00e7ekilmi\u015f her foto\u011fraf karesinde, yaz\u0131p s\u00f6yle\u015fti\u011fim her insanda,\u00a0 \u00f6yk\u00fcs\u00fcn\u00fc ar\u0131yorum g\u00f6zlerim kapal\u0131. Evlerin bir birilerinden g\u00fc\u00e7 alabilmek i\u00e7in dizimi, sokaklar\u0131, yaratt\u0131klar\u0131 duygusuna kap\u0131l\u0131p giderken, ya\u015fl\u0131 bir kad\u0131n\u0131n g\u00fcl\u00fcmsemesi tak\u0131l\u0131yor g\u00f6z\u00fcme. Yoksa g\u00fcl\u00fcmseyen \u00e7i\u00e7ekler mi? Nevruz Mevki Nr.7 Tepek\u00f6y, Evimin soka\u011fa bakan y\u00fcz\u00fc renk renk \u00e7i\u00e7eklerle donat\u0131lm\u0131\u015f. \u0130nsan \u00e7i\u00e7ekleri seviyor. \u00c7i\u00e7eklere ya\u015fam\u0131nda yer a\u00e7t\u0131k\u00e7a, sevinci \u00e7o\u011falmaya duruyor. Hasret’de \u00e7o\u011falan sevin\u00e7ten pay\u0131na d\u00fc\u015fene sar\u0131l\u0131yor.\"\"<\/a>
Stathakis, Maki, Niki, Stavro, Niko, Yorgo, Marina<\/strong> ve daha niceleri i\u00e7in de bu b\u00f6yle. Benim i\u00e7in de bu b\u00f6yle. G\u00fcler y\u00fcz\u00fcnde \u00e7i\u00e7eklerimizin izi var. \u201cBen bu Ada\u2018da do\u011fdum.\u201d diyor \u201c sonra g\u00f6\u00e7 ettik. Bu ada\u2019da\u00a0 neler kalm\u0131\u015ft\u0131? Ard\u0131m\u0131zda neler b\u0131rakt\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z \u00f6nemlidir. Bir g\u00fcn ard\u0131m\u0131zda b\u0131rakt\u0131klar\u0131m\u0131z bize s\u00f6yler tekrar, tekrar, geriye d\u00f6n\u00fcl\u00fcp, d\u00f6n\u00fclemeyece\u011fini, bunu isteyip,\u00a0 istemeyece\u011fimizi.
Birden Stathakis ve onun gibilerle empati kuruyorum.\u00a0 Kendi do\u011fdu\u011fum mahalle’de, b\u0131rakt\u0131\u011f\u0131m evimin merdivenlerini an\u0131ms\u0131yorum. Birlikte oyunlar oynad\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z,\u00e7ocukluk arkada\u015f-lar\u0131m\u0131,\u00a0 Kap\u0131s\u0131\u00a0 kapanm\u0131\u015f evimi. Art\u0131k an\u0131lar\u0131mdan ba\u015fka hi\u00e7bir yerde olmayan. Bir g\u00fcn yeniden arkada\u015flar\u0131mla oyunlar oynamay\u0131 istememeliyim. O evi kapatt\u0131lar! Bana geriye d\u00f6n\u00fclemeyece\u011fini s\u00f6yl\u00fcyor kapanan o ev.-<\/p>\n

Kap\u0131lar\u0131 Kapanan evler; <\/strong><\/p>\n

B\u00fcy\u00fckada ve di\u011fer adalarda b\u0131rakt\u0131klar\u0131 evler i\u00e7in\u00a0 T\u00fcrklere ve Rumlara neler s\u00f6yl\u00fcyor?\u00a0 Y\u0131llar sonra Yunanistana giden dost-lar\u0131m, arkada\u015flar\u0131m Yunanca \u00f6\u011frenmek zorunda kald\u0131klar\u0131n\u0131 s\u00f6ylediklerinde \u015fa\u015f\u0131rm\u0131\u015ft\u0131m. Bir \u00e7o\u011funa, T\u00fcrk tohumu diyerek a\u015fa\u011f\u0131lad\u0131klar\u0131n\u0131,\u00a0 soy isimlerini de\u011fi\u015ftirmek mecburiyetinde kald\u0131klar\u0131na \u015fahit oldum.Vatanlar\u0131nda zul\u00fcm g\u00f6r\u00fcp, gitmek zorunda b\u0131rak\u0131lan\u00a0 dost\u00a0 ve karde\u015flerimiz gittikleri yerde’de z\u00fclme maruz b\u0131rak\u0131lm\u0131\u015flard\u0131. \"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Bu g\u00fcn \u0130stanbul’da, Adalarda Anadolunun genelinde parmakla say\u0131lacak kadar az Rum, T\u00fcrk Ortodoks dost ve arkada\u015flar\u0131m\u0131z var.\u00a0 Ancak Yunanistan\u2019da\u00a0 T\u00fcrkiyeden giden\u00a0 Rumlar\u0131n, ortodoks T\u00fcrklerin kurduklar\u0131\u00a0 birlikte ya\u015fad\u0131klar\u0131 \u00e7e\u015fitli b\u00f6lgelerde ya\u015famlar\u0131 hep yar\u0131m.\u00a0 Ayr\u0131 \u00fclkelerdeki karde\u015f beldeler ve insanlar\u0131 ortak duygular i\u00e7inde, ge\u00e7mi\u015flerinin izlerini s\u00fcrmek istiyor. Bu izler kendisini en canl\u0131 bi\u00e7imde evlerde ya\u015fat\u0131yor. Evler, i\u00e7lerinde ya\u015fayan insanlarla birlikte soluk al\u0131p vermeyi s\u00fcrd\u00fcrm\u00fc\u015f. Koruma alt\u0131na al\u0131nanlar, ancak di\u011fer tarihi yap\u0131lar evler kadar \u015fansl\u0131 olamam\u0131\u015f. Oysa ekmek kavgas\u0131 hep bildi\u011fimiz kavga\u2026\u00a0<\/p>\n

Sonra\u2026\u00a0<\/strong>Naz\u0131m Hikmet\u2019i an\u0131ms\u0131yorum: \u201c<\/strong><\/p>\n

Ve a\u00e7sak, yorgunsak,\u00a0<\/strong>al kan i\u00e7indeysek e\u011fer<\/strong><\/p>\n

Ve h\u00e2l\u00e2 \u015farab\u0131m\u0131z\u0131 vermek i\u00e7in \u00fcz\u00fcm gibi eziliyorsak<\/strong>,<\/p>\n

Kabahat senin demeye de dilim varm\u0131yor ama,<\/strong><\/p>\n

Kabahatin \u00e7o\u011fu senin can\u0131m karde\u015fim\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

Kalan bir ka\u00e7 Rum dostum Ada’da, mahsun B\u00fcy\u00fckadada’dan ben ba\u015fka yer bilmem.\u201d diyor. \u201cBurada do\u011fdum, burada \u00f6lece\u011fim.\u201d Ba\u015fka bir yer bilmemenin kederini ar\u0131yorum g\u00f6zlerinde. Bulam\u0131yorum. Rahat s\u0131n\u0131rlar\u0131 belli ya\u015famlar\u0131n\u0131n ve ya\u015fayacaklar\u0131n\u0131n verdi\u011fi\u00a0 g\u00fcven i\u00e7inde. D\u00f6n\u00fcyorum Ortodoks Karaman T\u00fcrklerini D\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcyorum; Lozan M\u00fcbadelesinde 350 bin Ortodoks karaman T\u00fcrk\u00fc karde\u015fimizi g\u00f6nderdik yunanistana T\u00fcrk\u00e7eden ba\u015fka dil bilmezler, Gittikleri yerler de T\u00fcrk tohumudurlar. ya\u015fama\u00a0 \u015fanslar\u0131 neredeyse 0 d\u0131r. 3,5 \u00c7abulcu ile \u0130ngiliz\u00a0 k\u0131\u015fk\u0131rtmas\u0131na\u00a0 arka \u00e7\u0131kanlar koskoca T\u00fcrk Helen imparatorlu\u011funun sonunu getirdiklerinin fark\u0131na varacaklar\u00a0 ama san\u0131r\u0131m \u00e7ok ge\u00e7 kal\u0131nm\u0131\u015f olacaklar.\"\"<\/a>
G\u00f6rm\u00fc\u015f ge\u00e7irmi\u015f a\u011fa\u00e7lar\u0131n g\u00f6lgelerine at\u0131lan masalar, sandalyeler Hiristos tepesinde. Kahvehaneleri, iskele meydan\u0131, vaz ge\u00e7ilmezdir B\u00fcy\u00fckadan\u0131n.\u00a0 \u00c7ar\u015f\u0131s\u0131. Ya\u015fam\u0131n s\u0131radan ak\u0131\u015f\u0131n\u0131n, do\u011fal tan\u0131\u011f\u0131 bir meydan Vapur \u00a0iskelesi, ba\u015fka bir ad olmas\u0131n\u0131n \u00f6nemini yitirdi\u011fi bir alan. \u0130skele \u00fczerinde kendimi bir b\u0131rakay\u0131m r\u00fczg\u00e2ra\u2026 Karn\u0131m da ac\u0131k\u0131r. Tertemiz oldu\u011fu s\u00f6ylenen bal\u0131k lokantalar\u0131ndan birini d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcr\u00fcm \u0130skelede oturuyor ve ard\u0131mda kalan g\u00fcn\u00fc dinliyorum bu kez\u2018de. Geride b\u0131rakt\u0131\u011f\u0131m Yaban G\u00fcl\u00fcm <\/strong>geliyor akl\u0131ma.\u00a0
\u0130\u00e7im yan\u0131yor, inad\u0131na susuyorum. Sustuk\u00e7a kopar\u0131yorum her bir par\u00e7am\u0131 bedenimden. Duygular\u0131m bende h\u00fck\u00fcms\u00fcz, d\u00fc\u015flerim yar\u0131m. Yaln\u0131zl\u0131\u011f\u0131n kap\u0131lar\u0131 kapan\u0131yor y\u00fcz\u00fcme, ruhum bir orada bir burada, gel gitlerde firari \u00e7ocuklu\u011fum. B\u00fcy\u00fcmek, asl\u0131nda \u00f6zlemekmi\u015f. Domatesli, peynirli sandivi\u00e7leri h\u0131zl\u0131 h\u0131zl\u0131 yedikten sonra tekrar d\u0131\u015far\u0131ya oyuna d\u00f6nmeyi \u00e7ook \u00f6zledim. Annem mutfakta yemek yaparken, masada ders \u00e7al\u0131\u015fmay\u0131, onunla\u00a0 sohbet etmeyi \u00e7ok \u00f6zledim. \u0130spirto oca\u011f\u0131n\u0131, beyaz fayans kapl\u0131\u00a0 mutfa\u011f\u0131 \u00f6zledim. Bah\u00e7emizdeki\u00a0 o dut a\u011fac\u0131nda g\u00fcn do\u011fumundan g\u00fcn bat\u0131m\u0131na kadar dut yemeyi, annem bir daha izin vermez diye g\u00fcn boyu onun \u00fczerinde oturdu\u011fum g\u00fcnleri \u00f6zledim. Babam\u0131n \u00e7am a\u011fac\u0131n\u0131n alt\u0131nda yapt\u0131\u011f\u0131 sal\u0131nca\u011f\u0131m\u0131 \u00f6zledim. Bah\u00e7elerden erik, mandalina,incir\u00a0 \u00e7almay\u0131. \"\"<\/a>Oram\u0131 buram\u0131 \u00e7ize \u00e7ize b\u00f6\u011f\u00fcrlen toplamay\u0131 , Do\u011fan karde\u015fden gelen mecmuay\u0131\u00a0 heyecanla okumay\u0131 \u00f6zledim. \u00c7ocuklu\u011fumun tad\u0131n\u0131 \u00f6zledim. Arkada\u015flar\u0131m\u0131 \u00f6zledim. Yakartop ,birdirbir, saklanba\u00e7 oynamay\u0131, deli aliyi k\u0131zd\u0131r\u0131p ka\u00e7may\u0131\u00a0 bile \u00f6zledim. en \u00f6nemlisi; dertssiz ba\u015f\u0131m\u0131 \u00f6zledim! neleri \u00f6zlemedim ki\u2026B\u0131raksayd\u0131m bo\u015flu\u011fa, hayallerim kalsayd\u0131 sadece geride.\u00a0
Ke\u015fke \u2018nin di\u011fer anlam\u0131 bu ben\u2018de ki\u2026onun bo\u015flu\u011fu sadece ”ben” im. Bende\u2019ki ”Ben”de ise sahip oldu\u011fum bir\u00e7ok bo\u015fluk. Kimi kocaman insanlar olmu\u015flar, kimi k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck \u00e7ocuklar. Baz\u0131lar\u0131 b\u00fcy\u00fcm\u00fc\u015f ama hala \u00e7ocuklar. Onlar hi\u00e7 anlamazlar. Durupta sormazlar hi\u00e7 neden? Hi\u00e7 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnmezler, hep devam ederler.Umarsamazl\u0131k diz boyu, ba\u015flar\u0131na vursanda g\u00fclerler. Herkes \u00e7alar ayr\u0131 bir telden, sabah uynamak i\u00e7in saat \u00e7ok erken, bu k\u0131sa yolculuk farkl\u0131 her zamankinden.Yaslam\u0131\u015f s\u0131rt\u0131m\u0131 bah\u00e7e duvar\u0131na d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcrken ben. Birde memo\u015f olmak var i\u015fte ba\u015f\u0131m\u0131n belas\u0131 ben.<\/strong> Art\u0131k sus y\u00fcre\u011fim !<\/p>\n

Duyuyor musun ?
Kimse g\u00f6rmek istemese de b\u00fcy\u00fck duygular\u0131m\u0131n i\u00e7inde hala O \u00c7ocu\u011fum\u00a0 ben.<\/strong>
Memo\u015f<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n

<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Ahmet\u2019in ar\u015fivinden \u00e7\u0131kart\u0131p g\u00f6rselimize sundu\u011fu resimlere bak\u0131yorum. \u00c7ocuklu\u011fumuzda sahip olamad\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z\u00a0\u00a0 foto\u011fraf makinesinin ne kadar iyi bir yol arkada\u015f\u0131 oldu\u011funu ke\u015ffediyorum.\u00a0Kaybolmu\u015f an\u0131lar\u0131m canlan\u0131veriyor birden bire. Bakarken siyah beyaz resimlere, renkleniyorlar g\u00f6z bebeklerimde.\u00c7ocuklu\u011fumuzun Futbol sahas\u0131, aram\u0131zda yapt\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z ma\u00e7lar; resimler siyah, beyaz renklenerek … Okumaya devam et →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[16],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/xn--bykadada-65ab.biz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/599"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/xn--bykadada-65ab.biz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/xn--bykadada-65ab.biz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/xn--bykadada-65ab.biz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/xn--bykadada-65ab.biz\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=599"}],"version-history":[{"count":20,"href":"https:\/\/xn--bykadada-65ab.biz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/599\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1203,"href":"https:\/\/xn--bykadada-65ab.biz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/599\/revisions\/1203"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/xn--bykadada-65ab.biz\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=599"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/xn--bykadada-65ab.biz\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=599"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/xn--bykadada-65ab.biz\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=599"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}